A slow life…

 

a frugal life

a cheap life

going without to save money

not having a paying  job

depending on someone else to care for me

making my family live with hand-me-downs

depriving my kids of things other kids have…

These were some of the comments I received the past couple of days and decided not to post because they were so negative.

I hope that is not the true impression of living a simple, slow and deliberate life.

Our life is exactly the opposite from those comments. We are very rich in many ways, live within our means and don’t have huge amounts of debt to have the things we want. Our family spends a great deal of time together and we enjoy it to the fullest. My children have life skills most will only read about or hear in a passing conversation. It is because of the slow pace we live that they had the opportunity to learn so much more than they could ever learn from a book, on the soccer field, or riding to the latest activity their mom thought they ought to be involved in even if they had no interest in it, or because that is what all the other kids were doing. It was their mom trying to make up for the time she didn’t spend with them or to keep up with one of their friends.

I am not and never have been a competitive or jealous person and those feeling do not carry any weight when I make decisions for myself or my family.

Being frugal isn’t about not spending money it’s about spending it wisely.  It’s about not spending every last penny just to have something. It’s about seeking out value, respecting what we do have and taking good care of it to last. No we don’t have all the latest gadgets out and no we don’t have to replace them every time we turn around.   We have everything we want and need though. Nope no Blue ray here, but we do have a 70-year-old garden shovel that I love with the handle worn smooth that I carefully oil at the end of each gardening season. I enjoy working with it and carefully putting it back in its place after I use it.

My days are filled with growing quality healthy food and preparing that food for my family. Filled with keeping a clean and happy house. Keeping schedules for everyone when needed so they will have what they need. It IS my job to care for them. I see nothing wrong with having dinner hot and on the table when my family gets home. To have my husband’s after dinner tea and the newspaper ready for him. I see nothing wrong with taking the time to teach the children no matter how old about what is going on at the house and involving them. That kind of work is caring for the ones you love and wanting to make things easy and happy for them, no matter how small the detail. It’s not spoiling them-it called caring and treating them with respect.

I have time to be involved in my community and volunteering my time to make another life happy in even the smallest way. I have time to do the things I like to do, my crafts, making soap, gardening, knitting and sewing. I have time to do the things that are important to me that make me happy as well.

So to those who see my life as something it’s not all I would like to say is try spending an entire day from sun up to sundown doing only what you want to do. Things that make you happy, things that would make your family happy and then come back if you feel differently about your comments. Or even easier just hit the back button and move along because anything I have to say will mean nothing to you.

If these negative thoughts are the result of you being jealous. I say to you it’s time you started with even the smallest detail in your life and make it happy to fit your life. When that small thing is working move on to something else to make your life simpler or less stressful. It might be taking the time for morning coffee in your favorite mug sitting on a linen napkin with a hot home baked muffin on a pretty plate. You decide what makes you happy.

I’m off to work on a hat I am knitting for my sister. She spends time in the fall up in the mountains with her family fishing and camping. It’s her favorite color green and knit with organic bamboo yarn, her favorite. This time is good for me because I like to knit, I like to do things for my family, I like it because I know it will help keep her warm.

Sure any one can drive to the store and buy a hat for a gift, but as I sit there quietly listening to music and patting the kitten every so often.  I think about the good stories she has told me about her life and her children’s life. I have a quiet mind to reflect on my own life and my family’s life. There is no stress involved unless you can count dropping a stitch two rows back and not seeing it in time, then having to find the crochet hook in the bottom of the basket to fix it. Now that is stress! But I didn’t have to fight traffic, put up with rude people or even wonder if she will like it or not. I know her and she will. I know that the sound of the kitten’s pur will melt my heart and make my evening almost perfect. Then I will slip beneath the antique quilt my grandmother made on top of her antique bed and fall asleep with out a care in the word thinking about what tomorrow will bring. It’s a journey only I can turn into a good one.

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Posted on May 20, 2010, in All About Me, Family. Bookmark the permalink. 13 Comments.

  1. I would love to step into your life! I am trying to create a life being more frugal, simple life and I don’t feel deprived at all. I think I feel much more fulfilled. I long for a simpler way of life, away from all the commercialized way of the world now. I have much more peace being out in my garden, caring for my family and creating something from my own hands. Keep enjoying what you do and don’t let the negativity get you down. Those type of people don’t know what they are missing.

  2. Most people don’t understand that many riches are not tangible things to horde, but things we give freely – love, time, attention, laughter…

    A smart woman once said that she CHOOSES to be the caregiver of her family, not because it is the expected job of a wife/mother, but because it brings her joy. It is nice to see you living with that same joy – thhhpbt to those naysayers. Those that don’t want to see, never will!

  3. It never ceases to amaze me that people will take the time to leave a rude comment. Why can’t they just move on…
    Anyway, I love your blog and I’m learning quite a lot. We love the fly repellent recipe you posted! The deer flies in Mississippi are terrible!
    Wishing you a happy joy filled day

  4. Hello, I just discovered your blog through Rhonda’s. What a great post! The simple, quiet pleasures of life mean so much more than what the world has to offer. My kids (now 20 and 17 years old) are grateful for the simple life we gave them, no TV, second-hand clothes, etc. They feel empowered by their childhood and don’t feel they missed out at all. As Terri said, those people don’t know what they are missing.

  5. Any negative comments like this that you get are from people who wish they could live the life you are living…but think that they can’t. It’s only a misconception…of course they can, they just have to stop caring what their “friends” and family would say.

    They need to do as Dr. Wayne Dyer says and live their lives based on meaning, not on ego.

    It takes a long time for people to figure that out.

    I hope you can filter out their comments or just accept them as comments made by people who have not yet come to an enlightened point in their life. Just continue to be an inspiration and folks who need what you have to offer will be drawn to you.

    BEAUTIFUL site by the way!

  6. That’s too bad that people can’t see the richness of your life – I have seen it within only a minute or two of visiting your blog for the first time.

    Many people have their priorities askew and sadly they won’t figure that out perhaps until it’s too late. I hate to be blunt but good luck to them in taking all that materialism to the grave, it ain’t gonna happen.

    I’m glad you are living the life you want to live. I feel the same way too. Having time to do what you want is a wonderful thing.

  7. I think your life sounds great ! I am trying to simpifly ours too. We do pretty well with out all the gadgets ( we do have some but not nearly as many as others do)and the things that we do for our entertainment other people would find simple and boring but we enjoy it and we don’t have to spend a fortune to have some fun. I think a close family relationship is important and is missing in a lot of families.

  8. Great and thoughtful post! People who say those negative things aren’t necessarily aware of their own feelings or where they are coming from. There are so many out there who have gotten on a treadmill of working and don’t have the time to even think about what they truly want. That was me a few years ago, though I probably wouldn’t have made a negative comment on your blog. It is painful to be living a life that is not true to your values, sometimes it comes out sideways. Once a co-worker told me she worked because she felt compelled to use her brain. As if a woman at home leaves her brain in a jar by the door?

    You have taken the time to identify your values and you are living a life that is true to them, I admire that.

  9. I wonder why these commentators feel the need to give their negative thoughts. If they don’t agree or feel the same, they should just move on…
    wondering also what search phrase they used to end up at your site when its obvious their interests are not the same as you.

  10. I was a bit taken aback by the negative comments. What a lot of nonsense. I’m in Australia and a follower of down-to-earth; thats how i found the link to your blog. I love what you are doing but most importantly YOU love what you’re doing – and that what its all about! Of course there is that old boring train of thought that equates the continual aquisition of things with happiness – lol – now thats negative. Go for it hon – you rock!!!!!!!
    p.s. s’cuse this ignorant Aussie ; but what’s a “peeper” and where do they sleep? 🙂

  11. I feel sorry for the folk who don’t know that it’s all about Respect.
    Respect and appreciation for the beautiful and simple things in life that give SO much happiness and fulfillment.
    Respect for the environment (home, community, country)
    Respect for oneself
    Respect for others.

    I love to read your blog, for you have truely found the way.

  12. I love your blog and am trying to live a similar life. I want to give my son (3.5 years) experiences and joy in life, not things. I want him to remember (as I do) the time I spent with my parents and the things we did – raising chooks was a highlight for me and my first business 🙂

    He loves to veggie garden, cook, play in the mud – so he doesnt watch tv or have a playstation etc – so what. I think it will make him a better person.

    Loving your own life is fantastic and I think this is a great post also!! Boos hiss to the naysayers.

  13. Well Said! I live a Simple Life with my family and I love every minute of it. We have just bought our large block and plan to take it even further.

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