Oh The Shenanigans Around Here

 An unknown Peony and Alchemist Rose
This has been a week unlike I have seen in a long time. I accomplished absolutely nothing constructive. But I have had a few good laughs, maybe not right at that moment but later on retelling the story.
Monday, I had set out to bake and can the left over pumpkins before they go bad. Over at Women Not Dabbling in Normal, Kathie, from Two Frogs Home wrote about Pumpkin Butter. This is exactly how I process my pumpkin for pies and bread later. I have never tried the butter but it sure sounds GREAT! If you read the post there is a concern brought up about the safety of canning the pumpkin because of it’s density, I would like to add I have never had a problem, I process mine in ½ pint jars, for 20 minutes.
I washed, cut and scraped out my pumpkins put them into the oven to bake. Just about the time I was setting the timer, the dog, Dalton decided to start chasing the cat through the house. They were playing and tipped over a bucket of potting soil I had sitting on the floor. My next project was to repot 2 roses, Theresa Bugnet, and Marie Bugnet into larger pots then dig the pots into the compost pile for winter storage. (I have drooled over these two roses for several years and finally had to order them this summer) Off I went to get the broom, scold those two scoundrels and convince them both they wanted to go out side.
Just as I was putting the broom away, the handle hit the shelf above my head in the closet and when I pulled it, it cough in a table cloth folded on the shelf and the whole pile landed on my head. OK now lets fold these… wait, lets sort through them I’m sure I don’t need ALL of these….just as I was finishing folding I could smell some thing….OH RATS MY PUMPKINS!…run to the kitchen… open the oven door… black smoke rolls out. My pumpkins are BURNT beyond recognition…. These ended up in the compost, no canned pumpkin today. But I did get the floor swept and the table cloths sorted. Guess I forgot to finish setting the timer on the oven.
Now the dog is crying to come in, I went to get him and his paw is bleeding. After a quick look I decided he sliced it open on a rock or stick, nothing serious. To the barn to get the peroxide, vet wrap and bag balm.
Off I go to the barn sputtering to myself not paying attention and wham down I go into a mud puddle, great…I do I quick look around to be sure no one saw me to that great stunt, and into the barn. NOW WHAT… the baby horse has a stick twisted in his mane. A 10 minute job to fix that and comb his mane out. OH THE DOG!…back to the house, around the mud puddle. Get the dog all set. Great back to my roses…. No wait I will change first, no I’ll dig in the compost pile then change.
I got my roses repotted and set into the compost. At this point I look like a mad woman. Mud & blood, hair every which direction and in the yard drives a carload of the Jehovah’s wanting to talk. I hate to be rude to these women and always take their book but assure them I’m not going to read them and I’m not interested in talking religion with them.
She rolls down her fancy car window and I hold out my blood, mud and compost covered hand to shake hers… I did try to wipe it on my pants a bit first…her lip turns up she pulls back her hand and rolls up the window and quickly exits the yard. She made not a sound…..but her mouth was moving.
I could just see the thoughts in her head, like little cartoon bubbles floating above her:
What is that woman up to? Mud…blood?…no it couldn’t be…yes it was blood!….was that a poop pile she was standing in with a shovel…..(little scream of panic from some where back in her mind) RUN DO NOT WALK TO THE NEAREST EXIT!….Come on car move faster…. I should have never moved to the country…
Can you just imagine the conversation in that car at that moment as they quickly drove out the yard?
And so this is how my entire week went. A few of the highlights…accidentally ran over my mail lady with my wheelbarrow. I had the time of my life getting gum out of my granddaughter’s hair, off the dog and one very unlucky dolly named “girl”. Had an interesting “conversation” with the bank teller. (I stopped to cash a check and she asked me if I wanted my change. Well yes, I would like my 78 cents, and off I went. I’ll spare you all the rest. But why would I give the bank my money, they don’t give money away)
And my favorite of them all…drum roll, please…….got to restack a very tall pile of lumber we have stored for the garage to be built next spring. We have already moved this pile twice for one reason or another. It seems son #2 was trying to send a text message to his work while backing up and didn’t notice the lumber that has been sitting there since MAY… He didn’t hurt his car, just his feelings and he did help me restack it all…
Who said life was simple around here always?

Posted on November 7, 2008, in Family, For Fun and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. It’s amazing, to me, the people you find when using Google. My search consisted of two words, pumpkins froze, thats it, checked out a couple sites, which linked me to a couple more, and then I stumbled onto this post. I almost fell out of my chair. I will be visiting again.

  2. Glad someone else found my week funny, I didn’t at the time but now it is and I have repeated it to my friends.

    In case you didn’t see the post about the apple butter, my mail lady did think it a peace offering but enjoyed the treat.

    Have a great weekend


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